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TORONTO - Theo Fleury has come a long way.The former NHL star has seemingly escaped the chokehold of addiction and now wears a smile on his face. His mission today is to help others escape their emotional pain.Fleury chronicles his spiritual journey in a new book called Conversations With a Rattlesnake, co-written with therapist Kim Barthel.Helping is healing is a key theme.Its my purpose, Fleury writes. I honestly believe its more important than my hockey career. I was put on this earth to help. Fleury calls Barthel the Wayne Gretzky of therapy. She says Fleurys intellectual capacity is pretty extraordinary, shown by his ability to take in information, assimilate it and act on it.Now 46, Fleury still sees himself as a work in progress. But his life journey is no longer two steps forward, one step back.Its only a half-a-step back now or a quarter step back, Fleury said in a recent interview. Because I have tools.Nice, interjected Barthel.Whereas before I didnt have any tools, Fleury continued. I reached in my toolbox and I couldnt even build a square box ... because I didnt have anything. Now I have a few screws, a screwdriver. So I can build some stuff.The exchange, in the restaurant of a downtown hotel, reads like an excerpt from Conversations With a Rattlesnake.The book is written in the form of an extended conversation between Fleury and his therapist. Its the product of two and a half years of constant conversation, according to Barthel.The difficulty was I couldnt keep up with Theo, she said. He would change so fast, that all of the transcripts from the recordings, they were way out of date by the time I would get to them.In essence everything got written in about four months. But the transformational process was over a two-and-a-half year conversation — daily conversation.Barthel, who now teaches therapists, says it is not traditional therapy — if for no other reason that no one would have as much access to a therapist as Fleury did. It was also a collaborative, rather than a patient-therapist, relationship.Fleury evolved over the months, with the first 18 months leading up to the real meat of the discussion.The book comes in a challenging format. But the give-and-take between the two does show movement and how they reached their conclusions. Its like being a silent partner in a marathon self-help session.Chapter titles include Its Not My Fault, What We Say is More Than Words, Relentless Positivity, Shame Revisits and Walk With Thousands.Its the kind of book that will be well-worn, with more than a few highlighted passages, for some readers.We can all be a conduit for healing, said Fleury.He has proved to be just that. Barthel says people seem drawn to the former hockey player by his honesty and vulnerability, reasoning that if he can change his life so can they. Its actually miraculous, she said. I havent really got enough adjectives to describe it.People approach Fleury everywhere. He cant even go to the bathroom, said Barthel.We have had some incredible moments of reveals, said Fleury. It would just warm your heart that people look to you as somebody whos safe.Fleury, who has no complaints about being a people magnet, says part of his success is that people understand he is on their side. They know he not going to judge them or use their deepest darkest secrets against them.And he understands that part of helping others is not interjecting yourself. Youre just holding the space which allows them to talk about these things that have happened to them in their life, said Fleury. They dont want comments. If they want, theyll ask. Theyll ask for what they want. But you dont provide anything other than Im just going to hold the space for you.And occasionally asking the right question, adds Barthel.Barthel has her own rule of rule of thumb — not to offer advice unless someone asks three times.Fleurys autobiography, Playing with Fire, co-written by Kirstie McLellan Day, was released in 2009. An HBO Canada documentary, Theo Fleury: Playing with Fire, came out in 2012.Both detail his life spiral. The bleak image of Fleury standing outside a Chicago crackhouse he used to frequent is hard to forget.The two faces of Fleury are captured on the cover photo of Conversations With a Rattlesnake.Theres the black-and-white shot of Fleury from the past, his face covered with an unhealthy sheen of sweat. And next to it, a colour shot of a smiling Fleury today.One is a survival face that says Stay away, Fleury explains. The other says Come ....Ive got something you might want to try.These days there is a glow about Fleury, who says he has not had a drink or used drugs in nine years. He says his story of abuse is part of him, but does not define him.I dont wear the Scarlet Letter any more. Ive gotten rid of it. And thats why I want other people to come to the realization, he said.Because I look at my parents, I look at Graham James, I look at the lowest points of his life, I look at them as gifts now. Because without those gifts, I still have that face. With those gifts I have this face now.James was convicted in 2012 for hundreds of sexual assaults on Fleury and his cousin, Todd Holt, when they played for him in the Western Hockey League in the late 1980s and early 90s. An Appeal Court later extended his sentence to five years from two.Fleury and Barthel first met in May 2012 in Winnipeg at a presentation by Barthel. Fleury, who was also a speaker at the conference, called it a thunderbolt of brilliance.He walked up to an unsuspecting Barthel afterwards to say she had changed his life and that they were going to work together from then on.It was amazing. It was like you were explaining me inside and out and I didnt feel threatened by it, Fleury writes in the book. One hell of a liberating combination. I guess we should never underestimate the potential for finding help when we least expect it.Today they are friends before anything else, according to Fleury.But when you have a close friendship or relationship, you should have these kind of conversations, said Fleury.Those with little experience of therapists might be surprised to learn that the growth in the book seems on both sidesIf youre a really good therapist, its always a learning experience, said Barthel, who opens up about her past in the book. Part of the process is Healer, heal thyself.Fleury says Barthel helped him understand his trauma started early in life. Fleury believes he was shaped by an upbringing that included an alcoholic father and depressed mother. The book discusses in depth the chemistry of the brain and how the way you are treated can modify it.The book is about finally taking a look at that family of origin trauma where I understand why my brain is defective, Fleury said.Barthel jumps in again to warn against the use of defective as negative language.So would she call him out on it if that exchange had been in the book? I just did, she replied.Which tells you that therapy is for the rest of your life, Fleury added. Theres no beginning and theres no end. Theres only learning and experiences.His own brand of spirituality — a mixed bag of everything from organized religion to aboriginal spiritual teachings — has played a huge part in Fleurys road to recovery.For me spirituality was the way back to self, he said. I dont care what you believe in. Its not my journey and spirituality is very personal. I suggest that you try everything.Fleury, who has been married twice and has four children, who has just embarked on a new relationship.He is constantly on the move these days, be it speaking, accepting an honorary doctorate in Guelph or giving a speech in Helsinki. Fleury reckons he is on the road 200 days a year while Barthel is at 300.Fleury is also making music, writing and singing rockabilly/country songs for his band Theo Fleury and the Death Valley Rebels. A record and tour are in the works. Its all a far cry from his hockey days. But it somehow makes sense for Fleury. Because Im a big thinker, I always felt there was something greater than my hockey career, he said. I just didnt know what it was.Today he does. He knows his life purpose.Thats to share my story and be vulnerable, and not really care about what the world thinks about what Im doing. All I know is the feedback that I get back is more positive than negative.The former Calgary Flames, Colorado Avalanche, New York Rangers and Chicago Blackhawks forward still watches hockey but with not as much interest and not as much invested.Because someday I would like people to say Oh, Theo Fleury, the spiritual guy and philosopher. Didnt he used to play hockey? That would be kind of neat.— Conversations With a Rattlesnake, by Theo Fleury and Kim Barthel, Influence Publishing, $26.95---Follow @NeilMDavidson on Twitter Justin Lawrence Jersey . 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Ryan Castellani Jersey . Luke Wileman and I stood in the corridor outside of the Vancouver Whitecaps dressing room at BC Place in Vancouver.While the Milwaukee Bucks have been dealt a pair of blows to their roster since last taking the court, the Toronto Raptors record continues to take hits. The Raptors head to Milwaukee Monday night and will try to win for just the third time in 10 games while facing a Bucks team that can add a reserve point guard to a list of sidelined players. The Raptors (26-14) have dropped seven of nine, including two straight after Sundays 95-93 home loss to New Orleans. Toronto lost for the first time this season when allowing fewer than 100 points after winning its first 15 such games. The consecutive losses have included a 13-of-50 mark from 3-point range and an average of 37.0 first-half points. Were playing in mud right now, said Raptors coach Dwane Casey, whose team has dropped three straight on the road as it embarks on a three-game trip. DeMar DeRozan scored a team-high 22 points, while Amir Johnson had 14 and 10 rebounds. DeRozan had been particularly strong in his first two games back from a torn abductor, averaging 22.5 points on 62.5 percent shooting, but he was 7 for 18 against the Pelicans. Terrence Ross was limited to a season-low 11 minutes and was replaced in the starting lineup in the second half by Greivis Vasquez. Ross was held scoreless for the first time this season and is shooting 33.1 percent in the last 12 contests. Weve just got to be there for him the best way we can, help lift him, just like we do everybody else, DeRozan told the teams official website. Weve all been there, playing in this league, everybodys been there in somme type of way.ddddddddddddWeve just got to help him out the best way we can, and get him back on his feet. Once he gets rolling, its going to be something he definitely needed when he looks back at it. The season series against Milwaukee started much better with a 124-82 home win on Nov. 21 to extend the Raptors winning streak in the series to five after 10 consecutive losses. Kyle Lowry had 20 points and is averaging 22.3 on 52.4 percent in his last three games against the Bucks. DeRozan, though, had one of his worst games of the season, scoring 7 points on 1-of-8 shooting. The Bucks (21-19) wont have Kendall Marshall after learning he suffered a torn ACL in Thursdays 95-79 win over New York in London and will miss the rest of the season. Well play the 11 that we have and well go from there, coach Jason Kidd said. Kendall brought a lot to the table for us, being able to anchor that second group, keep the ball moving and post up, too. The team is already operating without rookie Jabari Parker - out for the season with the same injury - and center Larry Sanders. Milwaukee learned Friday that Sanders, who hasnt played in the last 11 games, was suspended without pay for a minimum of 10 games for violating the NBAs anti-drug program. The Bucks are 7-4 in the games without Sanders thanks in large part to repeated strong defensive efforts, holding opponents to 86.7 points on 38.9 percent. Offensively, O.J. Mayo remained hot against the Knicks with 22 points. Hes averaging 15.3 and shooting 59.0 percent in the last four games. ' ' '